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Encouraging Exit from Unrequited Love

Encouraging Exit from Unrequited Love.

Unrequited lovers have always enjoyed a special kind of attention and sympathy from our society. We mostly never worry about how uncomfortable unrequited love is, for the rejecter. Do we not feel guilty after rejecting someone? Does it not hurt us to hurt another human? Persistence in spite of rejection, irrational and inappropriate behaviour are considered justified in case of unrequited love, which our cultural ideologies would not encourage otherwise. As discussed in my blog Brain Chemistry in Unrequited Love when a love relationship is ended by one of the partners, it can be really hard to handle, especially for the person who wanted the relationship to continue. But is it not difficult for the other person to make the decision to end what was? In fact, as far as I can understand, rejecters understand the situation better than the unrequited lover and are more sensitive towards the circumstances. They have the sense to walk out of an unbalanced relationship, or never let the relationship start, because they know this is not where they want to be. While all this time, all that the unrequited lover does is to cry over rejection and gain sympathy of friends and family.

If you want to attract good people into your life to have healthy relationships, you have to be healthy yourself. When you are of strong mind, body, and soul, you attract others who are. That’s how it works! Only you can break your relationship patterns. If you’re damaged, you will attract damaged partners. If you don’t love yourself, you will only meet people who don’t love you, or are incapable of showing you their love. In the Law of Attraction, it is believed that ‘Like attracts like. Lack attracts lack.’

The essence of a spiritual soul is timeless. The physical body is simply the vehicle for the expression of your spirit. It is the physical body that falls in love with the wrong person and gets hurt when the feeling is not reciprocated. However, the conscious mind cannot remember everything that has ever happened throughout time, because the conscious mind is finite. It is the soul that carries these experiences to your future. The Karma centre lies within you.

The pleasure of lovemaking, the pain of betrayal; they form a Karmic connection between two individuals and this connection remains with you, until you work towards becoming Karma clear. In my blog Unrequited Love and Karma, I have written how, today, when relationships are formed and broken so frequently, you will need to work hard to become Karma clear after a relationship has ended. This will be a time when you don’t have mental, spiritual, physical or emotional attachment elsewhere. Until the spiritual bond is broken, a new relationship will not work, and you may not even know why.

When your love has gotten hold of your life, when there is a lot of crying, screaming, there’s denial of facts and emotions. When you know you have cried every day for months, this guide within you will know that you are in denial, you don’t want to accept the facts. It’s the same when you’re a drug addict, like I said in my blog Obsession or Addiction?, unrequited love is actually a form of addiction. Find the side of you, within you, that’s your guide, your higher self. It will tell you this is not how it wants to see you, alone. It knows this love is never going to be reciprocated and keeps reminding you how emotionally weak and vulnerable it is making you. You will be lost in longing and you mistake it for love.  It becomes habitual and lurks behind everything, taints every moment of joy and happiness that could be yours only if you were brave enough to get over it. You must get over that denial, accept the facts and process the emotions.

A person needs to grow in life. Constant growth is the way to live. If a situation or a relationship is binding you so strongly that it is not letting you grow, even emotionally, it is time to move on! Use this experience as an opportunity for change and self-growth. As discussed in my blog Timeless Unrequited Love, it may hurt now, but nothing is a waste of time if you can use what you have learned, to create a better future! Like the author James Matthew Barrie had said- Let no one who loves be called unhappy. Even love unreturned has its rainbow.

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