Accommodating Ayurveda in Unrequited Love.

It might be difficult to be certain of the other person’s feeling in unrequited love. The other person—and probably you, too, if you’re honest with yourself—just doesn’t have all the information required for certainty about whether a relationship will work.

Although sacrifices and compromises are prevalent in romantic relationships, in genuine love they are not experienced as such. Most loving relationships involve both sacrifices and compromises. The sacrifices are easier to live with and lovers attempt to accommodate to their compromises and no longer view them as such.

Compromising in unrequited love will continue until the unrequited lover can accommodate themselves to the new situation and no longer see it as entailing a compromise. Accordingly, when making sacrifices, unrequited lovers may not even stop to consider why they should make the sacrifice for their beloved. When making compromises, however, a sense of unfinished business can prevail and they might continue to doubt the value of the compromise and continue to yearn for the alternative. Hence, compromises typically involve more emotional repercussions than do sacrifices.

As Romantic Ideology has certain aspects in common with religious beliefs, the term “sacrifice” is frequently used in romantic contexts as well. The term “sacrifice” is often used in religious contexts referring to the act of offering something precious to a deity, such as the sacrificial murder of a victim. Intense love has no qualms about making considerable sacrifices.

A strong desire to intimate with another person physically and emotionally, when unreturned, becomes unrequited love.

As discussed previously, the Ayurvedic system gives an interesting insight into our unique sexual behaviour by classifying our psycho-physiological constitution according to the predominance of elements. The three body-types classified in the Vedas are as follows:

• Vata – associated with air and ether and is a tender and romantic lover;
• Pitta – associated with fire and water and personifies the archetypical hot Latin lovers; and
• Kapha – associated with water and earth and is exemplified by ancient figures of the fertility goddess

These body types play an important role in the behaviour of an unrequited lover. The consideration of sacrifice can be encapsulated in the following statement that a lover might express: “Darling, please sacrifice something for me so that I know that you love me, and in return I will stop considering you as the major compromise of my life.”

Vata (Air & Ether)

Mental foreplay such as flowery poetry or stimulating discussion is the best aphrodisiac for Vata. A Vata lover tends to be erratic and romantic. An oil massage combined with soothing music is the ultimate therapy to set the mood. Touch and sensuality is very soothing and relaxing for highly-strung Vata types. Since Vata people suffer from dramatically fluctuating energy levels they are only interested in making love when they have the energy, more often in the morning rather than the evening. Since their bodies are drier than the other constitutions Vata types are advised to take regular reproductive tonics and rejuvenating drinks after fluid loss. Vata types should avoid sexual excess as it depletes their energy and strains their nervous system.

An unrequited lover’s decision to compromise is mainly taken out of fear of the risk of losing the beloved to someone else. While compromising in unrequited love, the agent will continue to believe in the greater value of the possible alternative and hence will not fully accept the existing situation. The potential damage in pursuing the alternative is seldom a reason, because an unrequited lover is mostly never interested. So rather than rushing to assumptions and impulsively reacting to those assumptions, try and ask yourself to accept that you don’t know how the other person feels. Try not to be overwhelmed by panic, and try to remember: You’ll be fine no matter what.

Understanding the body type of your beloved will help you in deciding the best way to follow, to get attention and achieve closeness with your partner. When a partner goes unresponsive or sexually disinterested, it leads to the other person in the relationship feeling lonely and in unreturned love.

This information may help you in building a better physical association with your partner and avoiding falling apart when the initial phase of excitement is over in the relationship.

I am going to discuss more about this subject in my future articles. Do keep coming back and don’t forget to leave your comments in the message section.