Unrequited Love and the Need to be Loved.
Understanding the importance and effect of tuning your cords with your beloved in unrequited love enables you to live healthy and yet continue to love someone, but with healthy detachment. It is an absolute necessity to have all of your own energy in your own space in your own body. Do not direct cords towards others or influence their lives. You do not need energy from others to survive. And this also holds true for love cords. You do not need love energy flowing from your beloved to live a healthy life, but you certainly need to save your own energy from getting drained through an unrequited love cord. You have your own life plan with infinite resources of energy at your disposal. Allow it to flow into you by tuning into the Divine source, within yourself. Be willing to receive this energy from within, which will fill every cell of your being, giving you life. Most techniques of delving into the subconscious mind such as Hypnosis, Psychotherapy or Psychoanalysis are often unable to clear past conditioning because these techniques do not consider the existence of these energies and do not take into account the metaphysical nature of the human being. It requires deep knowledge of all the energies that form a human being, in order to reach the subconscious blockages that form the basis of an unrequited lover’s earthly ego. When you start practising the spiritual techniques to get rid of the dysfunctional parts of your relationship with your beloved, you experience far more than a memory of a previous incarnation, in the developed stages of spirituality.
The entanglement of cords that attaches us to something, eventually leaves us encumbered and lessens our ability to move freely. In Buddhist terms, suffering has been defined in one word as ‘attachment’. However, this does not mean disconnecting from life and people to avoid suffering. It means not falling in love out of neediness or insecurity. Connecting through your heart but connecting from a place of loving detachment and not for ego enhancement or to prove something to someone or for some kind of gain. The love should be heartfelt, coming from a truly loving corner of our heart.
When we are able to give our love freely, when just to love someone feels like appreciation of self, without any strings attached; that is the state of loving detachment. It is very important for unrequited lovers to understand this form of love, because if you are able to love with detachment, the one-way love will not have as much negative impact on you. If you are able to love the unavailable object like we love the beauty of the setting sun, knowing that this beauty belongs to nature and we can only watch it, and let it have the calming effect on, without expecting anything else, then unrequited love does not encumber you. It does not pull energy from you. It simply Loves.
As i have discussed in my blog Unrequited Lovers Falling Upward, when asked about the severity of their suffering in unrequited love, the lovers reported more intense suffering than rejecters. While rejecters mild doses of negative effect, lovers suffer more extreme forms of emotional distress. Though rejecters don’t necessarily have uniformly unpleasant experiences, even if romantic attention from a lover was seen as unattractive or undesirable, most declared themselves flattered by such confessions, at least initially. As a result, rejecters have been reported to get more positive boosts to self-esteem than the rejected lovers. If you are able to love the unavailable object like we love the beauty of the setting sun, knowing that this beauty belongs to nature and we can only watch it, and let it have the calming effect on, without expecting anything else, then unrequited love does not encumber you. It does not pull energy from you. It simply Loves.
So whenever you feel that you ‘need’ the love of your beloved, you attach a cord with them, however, this cord doesn’t not connect through the heart. It connects through other, less clear places. This kind of connection pulls and sucks at the lover’s energy and do not work for the higher good of anyone. True love is unconditional. Do not place expectations or conditions on it. Give it freely.
Please share your experiences and I will add them to my future blogs.