Guiding Out.
In my previous blog Step by Step, I have discussed about the importance of steering away from the object of your love, once you have realised that your love is never going to be reciprocated. Have faith that the intuition is strong enough to giving you deliverance. It talks to you through your gut feelings, heart feelings, and head feelings. This is the seventh sense that bounces you on the head and says “get the hell away from this person”, but unfortunately, it is equally true that most people in love are oblivious to this voice of their inner self.
I know it hurts, acknowledge the situation nevertheless. Love yourself enough to not throw yourself at someone who doesn’t even understand your feeling, let alone reciprocating. When unrequited love has sucked confidence and happiness out of your life, take small steps towards gaining back normalcy. It is also important to have faith that there is going to be another love for you, and soon!
Realise
Having romantic feelings for someone is perfectly alright. But drowning yourself in unrequited love is unacceptable. By the time you realise something is wrong, it gets so bad, you find it difficult to handle it right and you cannot afford to lose it either, because you are hopelessly in love. There certainly must be some warning signs? What do we miss that could’ve warned us? I have written in detail about these warning signs in my blog Understandings Signs in Unrequited Love. Watch out for these signs in your relationship and take appropriate steps.
In my previous blog I have mentioned that there are some important questions that you need to ask yourself, like:
- Are you addicted to being in unrequited love?
- Do you like to be known as the hurt lover?
- Have you gone through something in the past that is making you fall blindly in love with this individual?
A little bit of soul-searching is required to get the answers to these questions. Don’t ask anyone because nobody knows you as much as you know yourself. Look for answers within.
Understand
Understand that there is not going to be a happy ending. Not in this one at least. However, also understand that this is not the end of the world, and you are not alone in this. We have all been there, done that. It does hurt, but you get over it and eventually move on. Trust me when I say that your life isn’t over. You will be surprised at what lies ahead! After the initial shock of rejection or heartbreak, you suddenly realize that all the pain was worth it. It made you a better, even happier person. Unrequited love happens, but this is just a preparation for a better, stronger love in the future.
Think back and see how stupid you’ve been. Understand how wrong you were in falling in love with someone who will never love you back; more importantly, someone who doesn’t even care! Remind yourself of the bigger picture – there is no happy ending in this relationship. Unrequited love is definitely the ultimate form of rejection. But in the process of dealing with it and getting over it, you actually learn to deal with rejection in the future.
When you are madly in love, you want to change yourself to be everything that you think your beloved wants to see in a partner. But with time, you get into a habit of doing it for yourself. You become aware of your shortcomings and start improving to become a much better version of yourself. Once you have rediscovered yourself, you emerge as a more confident individual. You start going out with friends and having a good time, initially just to take your mind off what has happened, and later, because you discover that it makes you happy. So it is not just stalking your love on Facebook or eating ice cream to overcome depression anymore. You realize that small things in life can often make a lot of difference.
Going forward, remember, the one who loves less controls relationship. While we do not want to be controlling the future relationship, there is no harm in being cautious, in order to save yourself from getting hurt again. Go on of this relationship with a mad, mad hope of finding happiness. And you will soon know how to fill your life with happiness. Soon enough, you will look back at life and realize how wrong you really were, once upon a time!
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